Letter from the future, concerning plumbing technology.
You walk into the stall, a sensor mounted to the back ceramic bio-terrorism absorbing tiles, instantly downloading your profile contained in the chip installed in the back of your bionic brain. You have had this brain since 1984, but numerous bodys, being that the year is 2220. The sensor takes your information and molds your bathroom experience exactly to your liking. The memory shaping seat sketches and skews to accommodate your unique posterior.